Sanity savers

by Heidi Scrimgeour

If there’s one thing you grasp quickly as a parent, it’s that it’s essential to have certain tricks up your sleeve for stopping a tantrum in its tracks of offsetting a mini meltdown (the children’s, not yours). So, MADE asked a bunch of mums and dads to share their sanity savers; those tried-and-tested tips that they’ve come to regard as fail-safe for tackling the many various challenges of parenthood... 

Laughter is the best medicine
My sense of humour is often the first casualty when I find myself stressing over an incident with the kids, but I’m frequently reminded that humour is the best defence against everything from tantrums to teenage strops. If you can make your child laugh, you can probably rescue just about any situation before it turns into a full-blown fall-out.

Just like mummy
Mum of one and author Jessica likes to catch up on her admin over breakfast, but as any parent knows, such things aren’t always easy to execute with a toddler in tow. But Jess has found the perfect trick. “I bought Ella her own toy laptop to save her straining to get her hands on mine,” she says. “Now while I have a cup of tea and answer emails on my laptop, she sits in her highchair and pretends to do just the same while she’s eating breakfast.”

That’s a wheely good idea
Have you ever encountered the horror that is trying to coax tired little legs up a hill on a long walk home? My friend Rob found the perfect antidote: a micro scooter. His son Ben adores his scooter, and Rob has discovered that he can persuade him much farther on two wheels than he would ever deign to walk on two feet. “When we’re walking somewhere, the scooter keeps him going in a straight line and means he’s more interested in zooming ahead than in dragging his feet and complaining with every step. I can’t begin to tell you how much I love that scooter.”

The dog ate my homework
The whole question of whether you insist on your kids doing their homework as soon as they get home is an issue that divides many parents. As is whether they have to get changed out of school uniforms once they get in, but one mum reckons nailing those two details solves several other problems. “We’re strictly a get-changed-out-of-uniforms and then get homework done straightaway kind of household,” says Shannon, sagely. “Homework changes a lot once children reach secondary school but I still insist that my girls make a start on their homework on the day that the teacher sets it, even if it doesn’t have to be handed in for a week. This saves all manner of last-minute meltdowns.”

Beware: hungry child
Within days of my little darlings starting school I discovered that there is nothing quite so fearsome as the after-school grumps. Happily, however, I also quickly learned that funnelling food into your kids the second they set foot out of the school gates can go a long way towards restoring them to their normal smiling selves. Mum of two Deirdre concurs. “My kids are always hungry after school so I make them a little box of snacks including things like Cheerios and raisins,” she says. “They’ve come to expect their snack box now and it helps keep everyone happy on the way home from school.”

Check your bags here
One of my own personal sanity savers isn’t really about the kids but more to do with my own organisational skills. I’ve realised that the only way to ensure that I stay on top of the seemingly-endless list of things that must be paid for, signed, read and returned to my children’s school each week is to empty their bags the second they get home, and complete every bit of admin before I so much as put the kettle on. We’ve had a few too many near-misses with letters from teachers getting overlooked or school events being missed out on because we didn’t return the forms in time, but filling in the paperwork right away has put paid to that. 

This’ll make it better
My friend Krystle swears by keeping a tube of arnica gel in her handbag. “When kids are little they’re forever getting bumps and scrapes but few of us carry a first aid kit around - arnica is the next best thing, I think, and a little squirt of it along with plenty of sympathy always helps my child cheer up and feel better when he’s falls over or scrapes a knee,” she says. I know other mums who use variations on this, keeping a stash of plasters handy or even a Mr Bump ice-pack. Perfect for treating little war wounds and helping put brave soldiers back on their feet.

Safety in numbers
Perhaps the best sanity saver, though, is to remember that there is safety in numbers. If some aspect of parenthood is driving you crackers or you find yourself baffled by how to cope better with a particular element of being a mum, remember that often the very best tactic is to admit defeat and call in some help from other parents. Admit that you’re struggling and ask your mates how they cope with that particular scenario or use a forum on the internet to seek advice and input into your situation. It might be a cliché but it’s also true; a problem shared really is a problem halved. 

Other sanity-saving ideas

• Introduce floor-meals into your home. Somehow food sitting on a picnic blanket tastes better!  
• When grocery shopping, let your child hold the shopping list and dramatically tick things off it. 
• To get out the door quickly, make it a race and tell everyone to get in the car before the microwave beeps! 
• Cut sandwiches into tiny squares and call it a party lunch. 
• Pretend shoes have feelings and tell your kids, the ‘trainers are sad because no one picked them up today’.
• Announce that the supermarket has a strict ‘only children who are behaving nicely are allowed to buy biscuits’ policy.