Raising third-culture kids

by Claudia Esnouf

Amidst this fast-paced, globalised world where ease of travel meets online dating, thousands of families are facing lifestyle questions when it comes to raising their multicultural children. Almost 25% of the Edinburgh population was born outside the UK, with that number continuing to rise, allowing for rich diversity and multiculturalism. 
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Third Culture Kids (TCK) is a term originally coined by sociologist Ruth Hill Useem, who defines it as children who are raised in a culture other than their parents’ one and who might grow up in a different country for a large part, or the entirety, of their childhood.  

With regards to the term “third culture kid”, the first culture is the culture in which the parents grew up; the second refers to the culture in which the family currently resides; and the third culture is the fusion of these, the one to which the child will identify the most.

I’m a Third Culture Adult, who was born and raised in Chile by a South African father and Irish mother, moved to the UK to study, and married an Aberdonian. Our children are aged two and three and have already lived in three different countries. 

So how do we raise and guide our children on their own identity journey while keeping their rich heritage intact? How will they grow up understanding an ever-changing definition of home? 

Books
Books are a huge way of transporting us to different worlds. Be creative here. It’s not just reading to your children in different languages, but finding ways of incorporating parts of your culture in books. What are the iconic children books from your cultures? Are there national animals you can find stories about, or unique landscapes where stories are set? Are there certain myths and legends you could relate orally or find picture books that allude to them? 

In Edinburgh, books are hugely accessible – and often affordable – with the endless amount of second-hand bookstores and shops, charity associations and libraries. Most libraries also have a foreign language section, including the National Library of Scotland.  

Don’t forget Audiobooks, which are a great way to encourage stories in your home, and even better if they are in your home language. Audiobooks can be found on Audible, Spotify or even Tonie Boxes (there are now characters in Spanish, French and German) and are great to have on in the background during dinner or bathtime.   

Home Decor 
Find ways to incorporate home decor that evokes part of your cultures. This doesn’t have to be an expensive project. If you have family or friends visiting from back home, you could ask them to bring across a couple of prints, or ornaments from a local street market. In the midst of Latin America, I grew up in a house with wooden African sculptures and framed Celtic crosses. Even printing out a few of your country flags and dotting them about the house is a way for your child to get familiar with their nationalities. 

Holidays
Figure out what the important dates are for you and which ones you want to share with your family. Which ones did you celebrate growing up? You could each choose a few, and make sure to enjoy them. In each country we have lived in, we have always tried to celebrate Burns Night and 18 September (Chile’s Independence Day). Support each other when doing this too. If your kids see the whole household making the effort and being involved, they will all want to participate. For religious dates, find a local venue which you can celebrate rituals together. 

The German Church in Edinburgh has a thriving community of multicultural families and welcomes people of all denominations. As well as their busy programme of church services and non-religious social events, they celebrate seasonal holidays like Karneval in spring, St Martin in November, and St Nikolaus and Advent in December.

You could even find groups in Edinburgh (Facebook or Meetup Groups) who might be celebrating these dates, and join in the fun! 

Sports
Sports is an easy one to get on board, and a great way to practice the national anthems, wear the t-shirts and even find other supporters in your local pubs. In our home, we celebrate Scottish, South Africa – and even Chilean! – rugby. Bottom line is to support each other. You don’t want to create divisions between your kids and your spouse, so just all cheer along (even if inside you’re crying!) 

Languages 
Edinburgh boasts an array of dynamic children language classes, starting them as young as babies. Try and find classes that will incorporate languages with play, music and activity, like Say Hola With Me, who bring Spanish to life with in-person and online classes for everyone. 

From individual lessons to fun family sessions, they make language learning enjoyable and natural through stories, music, hands-on activities, and playful interactions.

Or, The Universe of Language that run fully immersive, play-based German groups for babies, preschoolers and school children, formal German and French classes for children and adults as well as one-to-one tuition for a variety of ages. 

It’s also very easy to put on a YouTube video in your home language, find a Spotify playlist, or put Netflix in your home language, so your child gets exposure. Peppa Pig has a great Spanish accent!  

Scotland 
Embrace Scotland. Scotland has an incredibly rich heritage, culture and history. If you’re living in Edinburgh, Scotland will be part of your children’s lives and what better way to explore it in such a captivating city. Learn as a family, and through your children’s eyes. Edinburgh has so much to offer and teach, not to mention the history steeped in the rest of Scotland. Visit the family-friendly National Museum of Scotland, or the first museum in the world dedicated to the history of childhood, The Museum of Childhood, hike up Arthur’s Seat, have an outdoor adventure through Jupiter Artland or simply saunter down the Royal Mile. 

The Universe of Language runs activity tours in Edinburgh for German-speaking children, teaching them about Scottish traditions such as kilts, songs, food, ceilidh dance and Highland Games, as well as about local plants and animals. 

The tours are held in German, and are great for small groups or individual families who have just moved here, or want to show their relatives or friends visiting from abroad something about Scottish culture.

Scotland is a proud nation, but a welcoming and inclusive one. The only thing to be aware of is its magnetic force. No matter how much I try and embark on a new adventure, I always end up coming back here. With multiple nationalities, I’ll gladly add one more to my list: Scottish. 

Growing up in a myriad of cultures can only be beneficial for your child, and it will encourage them to be adaptable, curious, tolerant and well-rounded people. Ultimately, your children will grow up learning about their cultures through your teachings, and they will associate their heritage with you and the home that you have made for them. While they might chase their own identity path through their surroundings, schools and friends, home will always be home, and that home will always carry an extraordinary unique value. 

Find out more
Claudia Esnouf is a writer based in Stockbridge, and a proud, over-exhausted mum of two boys who are just 11 months apart. She is author of Walk Like A Girl, recently published with Sparsile Books.